By Mallanaga Vatsyayana
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Example text
D. Talking about It in Public Another participant (I): Sometimes I feel like I’m taking care of my mate’s feelings. In the past I’d sometimes say something that he considered private or personal to another couple or in a group. I’ve since gotten clear on the difference between his stuff and my stuff, but occasionally there is a fine line between what I can and can’t say. ” Sometimes when I ask and he says no, or says I shouldn’t have said something, I feel angry and censored. Do you get my question?
Do you get my question? Marshall: I think I do. Let me see. You’re saying that sometimes it’s not clear to you when your mate is comfortable with your talking about things with other people and when he’s not. Participant I: Yeah. Marshall: You’ve put your question in a non-NVC form and are heading in a direction that is dangerous. I cleaned it up for you and translated it into NVC. In the book, Revolution in Psychiatry, Ernst Becker, an anthropologist, suggests that depression results from cognitively arrested alternatives.
Concentrate on the positive things of life. I don’t want to bring up hard feelings. I just want to enjoy the good stuff. NVC-er: You really want to enjoy life and not get stuck down in some hole talking about negative stuff. Girlfriend: Yeah, I don’t want that stuff in my life. Do you know what happened to Emily today? She went to pick up her boy and couldn’t find him anywhere. At first she thought he’d gone home with their neighbor, you know, the Vellas, but then she ran into one of the kids and he told her that he saw her son leaving school at lunch time with a man, a guy he’d never seen.
Kamasutra by Mallanaga Vatsyayana
by Donald
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