By Claudia Bepko
ISBN-10: 0060920815
ISBN-13: 9780060920814
ISBN-10: 0061352756
ISBN-13: 9780061352751
Within the bestselling culture of The Dance of Anger, a compassionate and insightful consultant that exhibits girls how they could discover ways to be ok with who they're and what they do.
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Extra resources for Too Good for Her Own Good: Searching for Self and Intimacy in Important Relationships
Sample text
Then, sometimes if we’re out with people, I think, good, we’re going to this social situation so I have to keep quiet. If somebody got too close to me I might complain. ” Among women who choose not to “do it all,” women who stay home with children, there have been different casualties. Because the injunction to Be Competent has become a new standard of goodness, women feel bad when they fail to embrace it even as they live up to all the other injunctions: “Nobody has any respect for mothers who stay home.
I felt bad about this, I thought I had a terrible problem. But the truth was there never was anything to appreciate about being female in my family. I cleaned while my brothers watched TV. ” These feelings of Jenn’s tell us a good deal about her baggy clothes. Jenn was trying symbolically to hide herself from the world. She dressed to be indistinct, almost as if to cover up the femaleness that she thought of as so unworthy. Her clothes protected her from being seen, and they covered up any vivid expression of herself.
Jenn got the message that females were less valuable in her family. But messages about the innate inferiority of women have been part of the larger social fabric for centuries. , believed in the basic inferiority of women: “The female is a female by virtue of a certain lack of qualities. ”2 Women are afflicted. Women are defective. Women fall short. Women are less than men. The messages are like subtle hypnotic suggestions, and we are not always conscious of them. We know that the feminist movement represented the beginnings of a struggle to overturn those messages, to claim our rightful equality with men.
Too Good for Her Own Good: Searching for Self and Intimacy in Important Relationships by Claudia Bepko
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